House keeping skills would be considered an asset

Being a good housekeeper does not equate to being a good wife, much like being domesticated and paying the bills does not equate to being a good husband. I have in the recent past realised that is the perception of a number of married folk; I'm not sure when that notion became the accepted truth (at least for some), but it did. I too have been guilty of subscribing to that thought process and I could tell you I could not have had it more incorrect. While any spouse will admit to being grateful for the assistance in carrying out the house work - that is but a small part of this thing called marriage. Relationships and by extension marriage should come with a handbook - a how to guide.

I certainly do not profess to be a guru on the subject of marriage - mine is still a work in progress, a prototype if you will, we're still working out the kinks. But I can tell you this much, most people do not set out to marry a life long maid or butler - they marry a life long partner, a team mate (which is not the same as a soul mate/who ever coined that phrase has deluded and mislead a lot of people and should be hunted down and shot). Someone that knows (or at least is willing to learn) your strengths and weakness and compliment them - someone that will help you bring your A game. Most people just want a companion, someone to share the happy moments and the not so happy moments in their life.

We often treat our relationships like games - jokingly and not so jokingly referring to what we perceive as commendable/notable actions as "earning points" (admittedly men to this more than women). Often this is only a game for one person, with the other person getting the bitter short end of that stick. Really, if you are going to do something with your partner do it because you want to - not for sport or some misguided sense of obligation/duty. It is more than likely that they see through your bullshit, I'm almost certain that your spouse being of at least average intelligence was one of the criteria for marrying them. Simple example, if you don't want to stay home or be around your spouse then don't; don't stay because you think you should - you will only end up being physically present, but emotionally and mentally absent; which does nothing but make your partner feel distant/disconnected, which may lead to feelings of regret and resentment. And if at no time at all you feel you want to be around that man or that woman - then probably marriage/relationship is not for you and you should opt out. There is an exit clause.

This is no cake walk, and you probably won't get it right all the time - and guess what, it is more work than your 8 - 4 or 9 - 5. But if you want it, work for it. Damn it, I don't always want to be around my wife and child; and I certainly do not claim to understand marriage (or be the best husband for that matter) - believe it or not sometime I ask myself why did I get married. But every now and then I remember why, and every now and then I discover a new reason.

Hey marriage is not meant for everyone - I can't say with certainty it is meant for me , especially not by the standards set which I gleefully repeated after the pastor. I'm by know means perfect (God knows I am not without a few "character flaws") but until such time as I figure I do not want to be married (if I ever do) - I will be right here, trying to make heads or tails of this thing called marriage. It's gonna be one hell of a ride, but I'm always up to a good challenge.