Thanks for ruining this, whatever this is, it is what it is, and what it is is a place I don't want to be, with feelings of hurt mixed in with anger - ambivalent. Complicity in this irreconcilable duplicity. I hate this, walking that fine line, on a plank standing on the edge of an abyss of unfamiliar emotions, scared - fear of what lies beneath. Thanks for taking me to that place and bringing me back, from comfort to angst, trust to apprehension, in a breath, collapsing lungs with the wind sucked out of a fresh morning breeze. For what, fear, fear of being free from the shackles of guarded rancor; let it bloom, don't deny a slice of momentary illusion stretched into the minds reality, stolen but for a moment, succinct but enduring. Why extinguish this raging flame, pre-maturely, fear of being burnt, step back, take it in, bask in the awesomeness, the beauty of something so untamed - real. Live, love, fight, undaunted by the unknown - intrepid.
I have of late taken the view that no matter how rebellious, unconventional, non-conformist we would like to think ourselves, we are at some point always part of a similar grouping of people. We are never truly leaders, but followers. Followers, I prefer to refer to us as sheep; because at one point or another in our life we are all sheep. This is a place to express myself, vent my frustration with the sheepdom, and relieve my boredom. It is my therapy for all that contributes to my neurosis.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
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